Monday, January 5, 2026

Why Emotional Intelligence Matters Even More Today for Children

Man is a social being and thrives in the company of others. Yet, in recent times, with the advent of information technology, personal media devices, and the abundance of easily accessible resources, the structure of family life has quietly shifted. In many households today, each individual owns a separate device, often retreating into a private digital space. Earlier—especially in the Indian context—the family functioned as a single unit. Even everyday activities such as watching television were shared experiences. With only one television at home, family members negotiated, discussed, and arrived at a consensus on what to watch, learning—often unconsciously—to accommodate one another. Today, this shared negotiation is rarely required. If one sibling controls the television, the other simply turns to another device. This ease reflects a broader culture of instant gratification, where children frequently get their way without having to wait or adjust.

In such an environment, a child may not always pause to notice the emotions arising within them. When families functioned more as a team, everyday interactions created natural moments for emotional reflection. A child might think, “I am angry because my sister is watching the show she wanted two days in a row,” or “I feel happy because my mother allowed me to watch my favourite programme a little longer,” or even “I feel hurt because my friend played this game without me.” These ordinary experiences quietly helped children recognise and name their emotions. However, as shared spaces and experiences reduce, opportunities for labelling emotions—the first step towards self-awareness—also become fewer. When a child is unable to recognise emotions within themselves, it becomes difficult to recognise and respond to the emotions of others. This ability to understand another person’s emotional state and respond with sensitivity is what we call empathy, and it forms the foundation for effective communication and for living in harmony with others.

If emotional intelligence is not consciously nurtured today, we risk raising a generation that is highly connected digitally but emotionally disconnected in real life. Children may grow up efficient, informed, and capable—yet unsure of how to sit with discomfort, understand another person’s pain, or respond thoughtfully in moments of conflict. When emotions remain unnamed, they often surface as impatience, withdrawal, aggression, or indifference. Relationships then become transactional rather than empathetic. In a world that increasingly demands collaboration, communication, and emotional resilience, these are not small losses. Emotional intelligence is no longer an optional life skill; it is essential for inner stability, meaningful relationships, and a harmonious society.

So, the next time your child reaches for a device simply because a shared family activity does not interest them, it may be worth pausing to consider how we can gently nudge the child to stay present—creating small but meaningful opportunities for emotional awareness, empathy, and connection.

Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Activities for Busy Bees

Once your child starts to walk (or even crawl for that matter), there begins his desire to explore and experiment the entire world around him. For the physically independent busy body every single thing becomes an object of interest; right from the tiniest spec of dirt on the floor to the mightiest piece of furniture. I am totally awed with how much toddlers appreciate even the most trivial of things (read forcefully made trivial by the so called adults)...For example to see the bubbles that are formed while filling a bucket of water, to see the way a ball bounces as you throw it, to feel the texture of sand, to walk in a puddle of (dirty) water, to gaze at the starry sky and to point the Moon and different stars... the list is endless...
How I wish I could see the world through a toddler's eyes, how beautiful would the world be, how genuine would my happiness and laughter be...

SIGH! Now back to reality. Having a toddler at home and to match their energy levels is no joke and to be as enthusiastic as the little ones is to be on our toes all the time...LITERALLY! As parents, we run out of ideas to keep our ever bubbly toddlers engaged. Here are some ideas that you and your toddler can enjoy doing.

1. Reading books
Grab those bright colored picture books and read them to your toddlers. It could be very difficult to gain their attention initially, but once you read to them everyday they will start to enjoy it so much that don't be surprised if they make you read on and on and on. Besides, at least you get to sit down for a while and give those achy legs and back of yours some rest :-)

2. Sing-along time
Sing some nursery rhymes (just not English, try some in your native language too!) with a lot of actions and animation. Not only will it grab their attention and make them stay focused for a wee bit of time but they will get to learn some nursery rhymes in the process too. Try some Sa-Re-Ga-Ma too, if you can!!

3. Laundry
Oh yes! Make your toddler bring the clothes from the laundry basket and load your washer. You have no idea how happy and grown-up the little ones feel when you involve them in house hold chores! You can also let them fetch you clothes one by one as you hang them up in the cloth liner. Teach them counting in the process :-). Yes, and do take their help in folding fresh laundry. I also encourage my daughter to sort the folded clothes. And believe me, they hit the bull's eye most of the times (Beware, at times you might end up folding the clothes all over again if you don't put the clothes back in the closet at once).

4. Catch me if you can
Just run around randomly and let your toddler catch you to start with. The fun begins when you let your toddler run and you pretend to catch her and tickle her. Believe me, this activity will have your little one (and you too) in splits. But, do make sure the area that you run around is child-proof and not slippery. An accident is the last thing we would want in the fun time, right?

5. Stroll
Take your little one out for a stroll. Make up your mind, the whole idea of this stroll is just to let your kid dawdle, never have an agenda for yourself during that time. Let him touch the dead leaves/flowers, observe the butterflies fly around, jump on the puddle of water or anything (safe) that he wants to do.

6. Move your body
Play a peppy dance number and bring out the dancer in you and your child(ren). After all, isn't it a good work out even for us adults? Sometimes, my daughter and I also get to do some stretch exercises. She is so amused to see me do my neck and hand stretches! (He he...!)

7. Bouncing the ball
Who doesn't like playing with the ball?? Throw the ball/ kick the ball/ run-around with the ball... Playing with the ball instills concentration and focus with a lot of fun factor. Don't you think so?

8. Art time
Take some crayons or oil pastels (preferably non-toxic ones) and let your tiny tot do some random strokes with different hues on a notebook. It is a great platform to learn colors and to improve her fine motor skills. Caution: This activity should be strictly done under adult supervision. Unless you want a modern art on your wall/floor or worse a tattoo on their body :-) Also, the colors could be a choking hazard/toxic for kids.

9. Clean up
Towards the end of the day, see if you can take their help in cleaning their toys and books. Even if they bring just one toy of theirs to you, appreciate them. It will motivate them to clean up. But NEVER EVER expect them to clean up when they are tired/hungry. You will find the place to be messier than how it was a few minutes ago.

If you have any ideas please do share it!

Friday, February 14, 2014

Fighting Constipation

Once we become parents I am staggered with how much we start to appreciate basic bodily functions...from the REPULSIVE poop it becomes HOORAY poop!!  When children start to eat solids, they sometimes face a parent's worst nightmare; Constipation. As a parent our heart goes out to see our little baby struggle to get her stools out. Especially to see her tender face turn from baby pink to beetroot red only to see the waste matter play peekaboo! After an effort of hours and perhaps even a day or two, it is such a relief to see your baby have her bowel movement. With intelligent diet modifications, constipation can very well be prevented. These ideas have worked out well for my daughter. Hope they help you too.

1. Water
Check if your baby drinks enough water. Try feeding her few spoons of water after every meal or in between meals. If she drinks water in a sipper, keep the sipper in her view. So that, in case she gets thirsty, she can point the sipper to you or reach it herself. (Yes, but do remember to have an eye on her as she drinks water). Keeping your baby hydrated is very important especially during summers. 

2. Fruit Juices
Give your baby about 100 ml of fresh orange/sweet-lime juice (sans sugar that is) everyday. It is advised not to give your children any form of sugar that includes honey/jaggery/brown sugar/palm sugar until they turn one. Fruits like oranges/sweet-limes have good amounts of fiber that help in pushing the bowel out.

3. Fruits
Give at least a serving of fruits everyday. You can give her any fruit; apple/banana/pear in whatever form she likes. If your baby has just started to eat solids, it is a good idea to cook apple/pear and mash it well without lumps before feeding her. Always feed your baby fully ripe bananas (bananas that have black dots all over).

4. Vegetables
Vegetables are an important part of a child's diet. Mash the cooked carrots/beans/potatoes/any vegetable and give your baby at least two servings of veggies. Once your child is ready to eat finger foods, he will appreciate to eat those tiny pieces of cooked veggies all by himself.
Vegetables and fruits are not only rich in fiber but have good amount of required vitamins and minerals. Also, the sooner you introduce veggies/fruits the more the children will take to it.

5. Whole grains/Cereals
It is advised by many pediatricians to feed children whole grain/cereals cooked at home than to give them processed food. So include locally grown whole grains/cereals like Ragi, Broken wheat, Rice, Oats, Millets in the menu. Be creative, give your kids Porridge/Upma/Dosa/ or even cookies made out of them.

Ensure that after introducing solids children have a bowel movement everyday (most of the days, that is...they could have off days too!). If they haven't had a bowel movement for more than 24 hours, then give him more water/juice. Also, giving him 3-4 teaspoons of Prune puree does ease constipation.  I also give my daughter an extra helping of Oats porridge and it has always worked.

After all, as the old adage goes "You are what you eat"!! So inculcating good food habits right from childhood goes a long way in bringing up responsible adults.
Also, please feel free to share remedies that have worked for your kids!

Thursday, February 13, 2014

Break ke baad!!

You know that I published my last post in November. Really, has it been that long since I wrote a post. What have I been doing all this while? Come on, most of you know the answer, don't you? I have a TODDLER at home. Well, is that the answer?

Then you might wonder what I do when she takes her nap. Yes, she does sleep for an hour or so and I completely have my ME time...totally. I ensure that I don't enter the kitchen or do the endless house hold chores or even pick the phone up when she sleeps. I have the entire time to MYSELF. Then, what is it that I have been doing? Reading books, Perhaps...Yup, I don't deny it, only when the book has been a page turner. Besides, I do most of the reading when I nurse/put my DD to sleep. In retrospect, I find that I have spent most of my precious ME time, doing-nothing, a.k.a social networking. How very wasteful can that be??

Now most of you might disagree with me instantly. I'm not surprised. Don't we catch up with our family/friends/acquaintances/colleagues? I don't deny it. We get to read what our friend fixed for that romantic dinner night with those mouth-watering pictures...Aww....How sweet can that get??? We also get to see the vacation hot spots of a long lost school friend...OMG!OMG! Did you really go there? How lucky...Then, our dear colleague flaunting her newly acquired size-zero shape in that gorgeous dress...At least, this is a little motivating (to shed our ever "cushiony" flab). Right? 

Sometimes (read most often) these social networking sites act as a platform for some juicy gossip. How many times have we been interested to know what our friend's friend or friend's friend's friend is up to? The list is never ending. Also, the more attention "networking sites" get from us, the more addictive we become to it. Vicious...very very vicious...I agree that humans are fundamentally curious living beings, but then, is so much curiosity essential?? Curiosity that takes away our invaluable time, resource and most important of all peace of mind. Misplaced curiosity, yes that is how it is called.  

As the adage goes, better late than never...I have decided not to dwell on these social networking sites. Of course, I would log in but never reside on it for too long. I only hope I am able to keep up the vow and so in turn I hope to blog more. 

There I see two little groggy eyes stare at me... My ME time is up for the day :-))

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Oats Porridge


Oats Porridge is yet another wholesome meal for your precious little one. Not only is it super nutritious but it can be cooked in a jiffy also.  Any instant oats (Quaker, Baggry's) that is available in the grocery stores(in India!) can be used to make porridge.

If your child has just started eating solids, then powder the oats finely in a blender and store it in an air-tight container. For new solid eaters the texture of plain oats would not be very appealing and hence you would have to powder it finely. Once your child becomes an expert solid eater, she would start to enjoy oats in its own form (say about when she is 10-12 months old).

The cooking procedure is the same as you make any other porridge. I also have it mentioned in Ragi porridge post right in my blog. Nevertheless, for quick reference here goes the recipe.

1. Take two leveled table-spoons of oats (powdered oats for infants) in a heavy bottomed vessel. Add 3/4th cup water to it.
2. Mix it well so that no lumps are visible.
3. Put the heavy bottomed vessel on the stove and keep stirring the mixture (If you don't stir continuously, Oats could settle at the bottom of the bowl and can get burnt).
4. In couple of minutes you should see the mixture thickening, if you feel the mixture is a little too thick, add water to it. (Children who have just started with solids prefer thin porridge. So add more water to it. Once your child is a Pro solid eater, he should like thicker porridge)
5. Finally when you see the porridge boiling, turn off the stove. 
6. Let the porridge cool to the room temperature before feeding it to the little one. Some kids like the porridge a little lukewarm.


Oats porridge is a great source of fiber. And so if your child is constipated, giving her a meal of oats porridge everyday could ease her constipation (and give us parents the MENTAL PEACE). 

Friday, July 19, 2013

Reading to your little ones

How many of us like Reading books? Many of us, don't we?

Reading, not necessarily those weighty tomes, even Tinkles, Amar-Chitra-Kathas, Archies and Tin-tins provide comfort and let us stay absorbed for at least a wee bit of time. For, the world that we live in today is loaded with distractions in the form of TV, Laptop, Tablets, Smart Phones, Internet (Oh! The list seems endless)...where Multi-tasking rules (read ruins) us...where most of the family dinner times are spent viewing TV...where time with our loved ones is disbursed peeking into the lappie...where time in restroom that gives so much relief is spent looking for Facebook/twitter updates in smart phones...At times, I wonder who our real family and friends are??


Kids of this generation do have a lot of distractions and it becomes the sole responsibility of the parents to instill habits and hobbies in them that will last a lifetime and let them stay focused. Reading is one such therapeutic interest that kids could love right from a very young age, say right from they are 6 months old (and some kids right from they are born). And yes! It is no joke! Take a book (this needn't have to be Alphabets/Animals/Fruits/Numbers book, it could just be a storybook with predominantly bright pictures) and try reading it to your 3 month old everyday. You will be surprised to see that your little one will start to smile and coo every time you begin reading that book.  Once your baby is ready to crawl and reach out for things, you definitely will be awed to see them pull their favorite book out of the clutter of toys and books and gesturing to you to read. My daughter who is now 14 months old pulls down all the books she has and is so engrossed when she flips through them. And slowly she starts the ceremony of fetching the books one by one to me (or to her dad) to read.



I sneak peeked my daughter immersed in her world of bliss


Reading can act as a bed-time ritual too. Read a book to your baby as her nap time or sleep time nears for a few days. She will understand that she needs to sleep when you read to her for a while. And, she does go to sleep; well, at least most days. There could be days when the book could put the parent to sleep and the child would want to read more and more. Reading for toddlers and preschoolers can act as pacifiers, especially when they have temper tantrums and are not in the best of their moods. Pick a book they enjoy reading the most and the moment you start reading you will find that they are calmer and are more inclined to listen to you (After finishing the book, that is!!).


Once a child goes to school and learns to read on his own, he is so happy and enthused to read all by himself. So much so that, he drags his parents to a book store or to the library to get more books home. Books can come as a great companion always. More so, when you have to travel for hours and hours. Older children like to read new books, however toddlers and preschoolers prefer books they have read over and over again. It gives young kids a sense of security in a new place (or as you travel) to do things they are already used to.


Reading if inculcated right a very young age can let a child stay absorbed in his own world

(at least when required), even when the world outside is bombarded with attention craving amusements.
Reading to your child dearest, why not give it a try???

Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Walk in Solitude!


It was yet another power-packed evening...between running behind a toddler who has just started to walk (nay run), fixing dinner, folding fresh laundry and end-less chores!!! Phew, I was a piece of dead meat. As we were eating our dinner my DH just looked at me and said, perhaps you should go for a walk. I blurted out a "no-way" defending myself. I said I was way too exhausted to even clean up the table after dinner, let alone go for a walk. He gave me "it-is-for-you" to decide gaze. My DH knows me a little too well, when I am in not one of those good moods he doesn't speak much (Women always win arguments, don't they?).

As I was cleaning the table post dinner, my dad and I were discussing about something that was on TV. When, suddenly I asked my dad if he thought I was gaining weight. And smack came the reply “Of course!” He told me that I did look fatter than how I was a few months back. I knew it was blatant lie, because I weighed myself only a week ago and the weighing scale showed that I had lost a couple of kilograms (Thanks to bundle of energy, my DD!!). But he did tell me that I didn't look fit. I kept pondering over it for a while and decided to go for a walk!!

It was well past 9.30 in the night, I stepped out of the house with my walking shoes on. My ear phones were singing a track from radio. Weather in usually hot and humid Chennai was oddly pleasant. The cool breeze that kept teasing my hair was so welcoming that it wooed me to walk. Not to mention the mind-blowing orchestra of Illayaraja’s track “Rakkamma” from the movie Thalapathy and the occasional lightning shimmering the far away sky took me to a land of paradise. Slowly, as I picked up pace, it started to drizzle…Wow! Mother Nature was being too good to me. It felt as though, it was just meant to be my day.

I was beginning to reminisce about the last time I walked all by myself. Perhaps, when I was pregnant. Motherhood could be demanding and can take away the “ME” time completely…with priorities and responsibilities completely altering life. Most fresh mothers begin to have a feeling that she is inevitable and is plainly frightened to take the “ME” time out. She always thinks of the zillion tasks she has. I was one such mother too. I thought the house would become disordered in just five minutes of my absence. I always came up with excuses to not to be alone despite my family being fully supportive to give me such time. However, this walk in solitude was doing me wonders. Each step I took forward, the clutter and stress inside me was starting to melt away. Ah yes! It was calming…very soothing. By the end of the walk, I felt I had so much inner peace.

Now, I look forward to walking all by myself every night. I have come to realize that spending even fifteen minutes a day in solitude and doing things that one loves, leaves one recharged. I feel so rejuvenated after the walk that I feel fit both physically and emotionally. Taking care of a toddler, DH, Dad and running the house though requires a lot of energy is never too stressful anymore.